Question: Offensive Axie Owners

This thread is not meant to attack anyone, but due to recent events I thought it necessary to seek some advice.

If we happen to come across someone seeking help for their Axolotl, who is turning out to be 'difficult' to reason with, what is the best way to approach the situation?

I understand if you think this is a silly question, though I am truly curious as to the answers you all may give.

Consider this: Someone presents a problem, we accidentally offend, so the advice is not taken, and whether from our fault or not, the axie dies....... How are we meant to feel? Is it our fault that this life was lost because we simply couldn't explain as we may have wished?

Once again I am not naming names, and not accusing anyone, but if the situation comes up again, I'd like to know how to approach, to give the beloved pet as much help as possible.

Thankyou to anyone who reads/ replies.

You can give out the best advice but if its not taken up and the animal dies its hardly your fault, forget it, move on.

Bear in mind that people who come here for advice often have very sick animals, and no advice in the world will save them. It's hard to give advice without pointing out what the owner has already done wrong, and some people are going to reject that no matter what. Ian is right, there's only so much any of us can do. We do what we can, and beyond that it's up to the owner.

If you see a particular thread where forum members are offending the owner, it may help to alert the mods if they are not involved in that thread already.

I think this is a very good post
It can be very difficult to help some people, but there are a few things that I have noticed, and this is not directed at you.
I personally think that before responding to any post, you should read the whole post first. It has been clear in the past that this sometimes does not happen, so some replies are repetitive. I can see where the poster may feel 'got at' if the same thing is said over and over again. A little thought in thinking how you word your answer is very important, insinuating that the person you are responding to is a mass axolotl abuser will not go down well. If you wish to point out something that they may not be doing correctly, add links to support your answer. I personally try to find something positive about what they are saying/ asking helps. Answer the post in a proffesional manner too. Personally as soon as I see anything written badly , as in lack of capital letters/punctuation, text speak etc, I more or less ignore anything said.
At the end of the day, we will all come across posts that can be distressing and frustrating. Luckiliy we have alot of people who use the forum who are happy to try to help, if you can't offer advice, step back. As Jen said , if you think a post is getting out of hand or unpleasant, report the post to the Mods. We will then keep an eye on whats happening.
Bare in mind also that the poster can be any age from , say 10 to 80. Some are easy to spot

I run into this problem at the vet hospital. Honestly the best thing you can do is to first think about how you are relaying the information. (Kinda what Julia said).

If the person still takes offense, find out what it is they are mad about exactly (did they misunderstand what you were saying, took it the wrong way, etc) so you can clarify that first. I personally like pm's for this.

If after all that they are still mad and chose not to take any advice that is their own problem. You've done the best you could, and it is not their responsibility although I can understand the frustration and guilt. But really, it isn't your fault. The owner chose to not do anything.

Ok so if I come across a difficult situation: add links to support my suggestions, write professionally, use capital letters and point out the good not the bad in the situation (still mention the bad though of course, just nicely). And if it does end badly, at least I know that I've done everything I can to help.

Thanks so much everyone!!!

Aimzs Lotties said:

Ok so if I come across a difficult situation: add links to support my suggestions, write professionally, use capital letters and point out the good not the bad in the situation (still mention the bad though of course, just nicely). And if it does end badly, at least I know that I've done everything I can to help.

Thanks so much everyone!!!

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That sounds about right! I find words like "just so you know, for your information, something to consider, from what I've read, in my experience" to be good starters.Or just offer things. For example if you see a tank with gravel you could say "Awesome looking axie(or something positive). I noticed you have gravel in the tank, have you considered using sand? *insert benefits and risk of gravel here*"

If people feel attacked, they will become defensive. Then it just starts a fight.