Johnny (
SludgeMunkey) found an excellent way to get rid of hydra. He posted this on a blog but I am not sure if you could find it, so I'll post his method here for you and anyone else needing it.
Materials:
-One 55 US gallon drum
-Five or six dirty socks (see proper method for preparing socks below!)
-A six pack of Mountain Dew in cans
-Four pounds of Dry Ice (CO2 in solid form)
- A Shop- Vac or other suitable wet/dry vacuum device
-One dozen Grade A extra large factory farmed eggs
-nine ounces of pug feces (a 50% mix of pug/chihuahua works well too!)
-two pollo y queso freezer burritos
-one USB 2.0 type "D" cable, 36 inches long
- A bottle of Maker's Mark
-one copy of the hardcover version of
Abraham Lincoln, Vampire Hunter
-soy milk
-a mixture of organ meats like haggis
Procedure:
1. Scrape up the pug feces and place it in the drum with the dirty socks. Add all of the Mountain Dew, burritos, organ meat mixture, and eggs. Mix well with a paint mixer or shovel.
2. Set the drum aside in direct sunlight for 8 hours, stirring occasionally. While this "stew" is steeping in the sun, open the bottle of maker's Mark and drink half of it in one long chug.
3. Duct tape all the openings on the Shop-Vac shut after placing the dry ice in the tank. Attach the hose to the "suck" port and then place the hose end with the crevice cleaning attachment into the "stew" in the drum.
4. Next, tie the USB cable around your head while reading aloud from the Abe Lincoln book. Consume the rest of the whiskey. Pour the soy milk down the back of your pants. Take a nap in the sun.
5. Once you wake up, dance a rain dance around the drum/shop-vac assembly while chanting "Oh Watah Goo Siam". Plug in and turn on the shop vac, taking care to have the outlet port aimed into the hydra infected tank or tanks.
6. Now, jump into the drum and stomp the "stew" much like a wine maker stomps grapes. Finish reading the Abe Lincoln book while doing so. The resulting noxious gases will kill all hydra while you are attempting to recover from drinking all the whiskey by reading and getting a good work out stomping the mush in the drum.
Dirty Sock Prep:
To properly prepare your socks, pick out ones that have no match, preferable those that have had their mate sacrificed to the laundry dryer. Place all of the socks on your feet and wear them for a week. Make sure to go on field herping trips in muddy areas, walk through the dog park blindfolded, and if possible take a tour of the killing floor at a local slaughter house. By not taking the socks off for a week they will achieve the proper levels of bacteria required for the biological reaction to take place in your anti-hydra reactor assembly.
